Tuesday, May 13, 2008

I love Ronald

That's it,people.

I'm officially addicted to McD, more than I've ever been in my entire life! I mean, it's incredibly majestic how I've yet to discover any shop that makes better fries than theirs. I've been splurging a hell lot on food lately, and half of it goes into the funds of these franchises, lol.

I'm def having another triple cheeseburger, large fries and their barbeque sauce this weekend (but seriously,0.50 AUD cents for a small packet of bbq sauce? geeeez.)

Anyway, my finals are in more or less 3 weeks so I thought I'd be using my lock-yourself-up-in-your-room-and-study,study,study plan, but I'm glad I've settled on a rather more enlightening (and voluntary) approach instead: spend a good couple of hours in the library. I'm happy with the latter, and if I keep it up, I hope things will turn out for the better.

Gosh I think I've been listening to too much of feist's "one evening" & clap your hands and say yeah!'s "in this home on ice", haha totally opposite songs! but really, i need a change of tunes,speaking of which I also can't wait for a change of scenery. Yes people, I shall be going back to KL (yet again) on the 24th june, insyaAllah. Flying back with daddy dearest since he'll be visiting me here some time during my exam and we'll be going back together after that. Can't wait to see my dad =)

Back to the topic of change, I REALLY can't wait to go back this time. I haven't planned anything and I don't plan to because all I really want is to just spend time with my whole family especially my dear sister,my brother and my lovely parents, and of course, the family gatherings and all that. Gosh I'm suddenly missing everyone back home! My grandma(s), my cousins, aunts & uncles. Basically,EVERYONE! Love them. *OK,now i want to grab the first flight home* =( Oh wait, I almost totally forgot about my operation haha. Now THAT'S something I'm NOT looking forward to.

Anyway, it's been so long since I've touched a book other than Deegan's International Financial Accounting or Peirson's Business Finance =P Recommendations, anyone? I'm ready to invest in books again.

Funny how I'm just staring blankly at the empty fillet-o-fish box while typing and hoping that someone would give me seconds or thirds,LOL. I really have to start jogging but heck, it's almost friggin winter here so there goes my plan. Then again, a few friends invited me over to play futsal at Albert park this friday, Can't promise but will def consider.At least I get to shed some kilos off should I decide to go.

Okey dokey, that's it from me.


Saturday, May 10, 2008

Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned

I can think of 100 reasons why I'm such a bad person.

Everyday, I have to live with that guilt.

It breaks my heart to think that I'm not being honest at all. And to think that honesty should come first, I feel worse. I feel like I'm digging my own grave and that all it takes is a little shove for me to fall in that hellhole I've created.

Why can't I reciprocate the same way? I'm just too selfish, and I think only for no one but myself. I don't mean to play around with his feelings, but that's how things are at the moment. I have a tendency to think that the ball is always at my court even though I know it isn't. And even if it is, it won't take long before the ball shifts to the opposite end.

On one hand, you try to do the right thing by ending it cause you know you're gonna save the frustration of prolonging the problem. On the other hand, you tell yourself the timing isn't right, but who am I kidding?

The timing is almost never wrong but I never seem to make it right.

I end up hurting not just him, but myself and also others too,and the problem seems to get bigger and bigger by the day. It's so much complicated, and harder than I think it is.

Some people say love is knowing when to let go,so I guess I don't love you enough to let you go. And the worst part is, I wish it stays this way forever. . .

Friday, May 2, 2008


Abg. Hairi, Jamming session dah habis but now I'm left with being emo je tak tentu pasal. Less emo songs next time perhaps?

Nabila, I miss you la. There's so many things I want to tell you now. And most probably the stuffs I want to tell you are stuffs that you already know or have heard coming from me since the first time you've heard me speak but I could never find the same comfort in anyone else but you.

Faiz and Nabilah Ulfah, we are definitely cool.

Pjat, thanks teman I stay up!! (just hope the pak guards tak kacau)

It's 3.08 am and I might not be feeling the same way about all this tomorrow. Good night!